Tag Archives: Alternative

On being authentically myself

We often hear the advice when people are going on dates or for job interviews or any other first impression situations – “just be yourself”. As if you could be anyone else anyway. But nevertheless, I still have been asked a lot about how I’m so open on this blog. I talk about so many things, from parenting woes to post-baby sex to postpartum depression. And yet, I hesitate every time I post a picture (or video) of Harley online. It’s a strange balancing act, but an important one.

There were many years when I would try to fit in. It’s not that I would change who I was, but I did try to adapt to my environment a bit more than might have been necessary. Each time I reclaimed my true and authentic self, it felt like I could finally breathe again. It’s part of why I love the geek and gamer culture so much – it’s a bunch of weird and wonderful people who get excited about niche things and don’t try to hide it. It’s why I hope for Harley to be a natural born geek – not just because I hope she finds some of those gaming or geeky things interesting, but because I want her to embrace those things that might make her different without ending up feeling weird. But I have to lead by example. Continue Reading

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1 Comment Rambling

Coconut oil made my psoriasis worse

coconut oil

If you’ve been anywhere on the internet, you will have seen that coconut oil is the new miracle cure. From acne to dry skin to athlete’s foot to hair care, coconut oil is the best thing for all your healthcare needs. I resisted its siren call for a long time, thinking that it would smell like a holiday and probably not do much. But once I jumped on the bandwagon, I jumped with both feet. Thanks to my sensitive and dry skin, I figured this could be a natural, cheap and wonderful solution. Spoiler alert: it’s not.

At first, I adored the coconut oil. It made my hair look luxurious and soft, it helped me scrape off my scalp psoriasis and it even left my skin feeling soft and smooth. I am a veteran moisturizer, so I typically know how to cover myself like those poor birds following the Exxon-Valdez oil spill. And that’s what I did with the coconut oil, using it daily to keep my skin moisturized from head to toe. It absorbed quickly, so I didn’t feel greasy afterward, and I thought I’d found the answer to life. Continue Reading

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1 Comment Health

Why my baby will be “alternative”

I am open to whoever Harley turns out to be. If she wants to wear pink and play with barbies, or wear jeans and converse and play in the mud, or even wear her pink dress in the mud as compared to staying clean inside in her overalls while reading a book – whatever this little child wants to do with herself is pretty cool with me. However, I have some alternative ideas about how I want to dress her as a baby, and the sorts of things I want at her baby shower. It’s all part of my grand plan.

For the first few months of the baby’s life, people will relate to her based on how she looks. She won’t be able to express herself and will instead be assumed to have traits depending on what she wears, her toys and whatever random stuff she decides she needs to carry around everywhere. However, the interactions with adults that she has at this stage are integral to her development; the words she hears, the tones and facial expressions will all help her understand the world around her. If she is dressed only in typical baby clothes, people will respond to her as a typical baby. However, by dressing her in fun and outrageous clothing, people will be far more likely to use higher level vocabulary when talking to her, as well as laugh a whole lot more – which is great for her development. Continue Reading

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3 Comments Geek, Parenting, South Africa

This above all: To thine own self be true

punk shakespeare

I like to think that I’m generally pretty true to myself. It’s taken me a long time to get to a place in my life where I can be open and confident about all facets of my personality, where I don’t have to hide who I am. I proudly declare my interests, my irritations and those causes for which I’m willing to stand. I suppose that’s one of my proudest achievements as an adult – I feel  like I know myself and I am not afraid to be my own person.

That is, until this new phase of my life started. I don’t like to pigeon hole myself as a general rule, but there are certain identities that I accept and have embraced. Things like geek, gamer, woman, journalist, blogger, food pornographer. Whatever the case may be, I’m happy with the things I do and how I’ve chosen to define myself. Continue Reading

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1 Comment Pregnancy, Rambling