Because friendships matter

It’s weird that while growing a future human who will be related to me, I’m thinking more about friends than family. It’s not to say that family isn’t important – obviously having an awesome family can make a huge difference and I want to be the ultimate support structure for my little Harley. However, my thoughts have been going towards a lot of my friends lately, and how important they are in my life, how they keep me sane and make me laugh and I wouldn’t be the same without them.

When Dean and I were getting married, a lot of people were throwing around that cliche about marrying your best friend, and I would laugh at them. I adore my husband. There is no one else on this planet who I could wake up next to every day and never get sick of, who makes me laugh every day. Dean does his best to make me happy each and every day, which is something that I do for him as well. We are beyond compatible and I couldn’t ask for a better partner, but he isn’t my best friend. There is something different in a friend, which includes the ability to moan about that same awesome partner, which is absolutely invaluable.

For many years, I had mainly male friends. I still have a ton of them, and they are awesome. They offer unique perspectives on things, inappropriate jokes, and a rough and tumble approach that makes them incredibly fun. But this post is sort of more about the female friends in my life. You see, there is something about sisterhood that is incredibly compelling for me at the moment.

I am incredibly lucky to have a bunch of rad ladies in my life who make me laugh, even in my darkest moments. Whether it’s through witty comments inserted during my rants, or hilarious rants of their own, or silly ideas and brainstorming that can only exist between two women, it has been such a comfort to me lately. From bizarre phone calls, hilarious lunches, and goofy messages, it’s that empathy and knowing that I really need to be able to laugh or cry or vent all at once that makes female friendship unique.

When I started this mommy blogging journey, I admit that I was a bit skeptical about the whole thing. I thought mommy bloggers were all sunshine and rainbows, sharing their happiest moments and craft ideas or something – like a giant horde of non-embezzling Martha Stewarts swarming the internet. I don’t actually know why I thought this, probably because I’d never bothered to read most mommy blogs before getting knocked up. However, since starting this journey and this blog, I have encountered some absolutely extraordinary women. Ladies who are always willing to take time out of their ridiculously busy days filled with balancing childcare and work and husbands and real life, all to say some kind words to me about what I’m going through. These women have been generous with their advice and compassion, and have already made this experience so much better and less lonely. I knew that I wanted to make friends with moms as I went along, that my awesome network of friends is great but probably wouldn’t know about some of the finer and less graceful things I was going through with being pregnant, and already I feel like I have the most wonderful virtual connections with a host of strong, interesting and kind women.

I suppose I just want to pause and appreciate all these wonderful people in my life, and write some nice words about them, too. I am so grateful to have such awesome people in my life, and my world is a better place for having them in it. I already know that having a baby will change my life forever, and I will probably fall off of the social grid for a while. I just hope that there is always a connection with all these awesome people, and that even when I’m only responding to their messages during 2am feedings or three days later, they remember that I really do care, even in my most sleep deprived haze. Geez, I’m not looking forward to the sleep deprivation…


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