Tag Archives: Parenting

Advice when starting nursery school

waldorf nursery school

Having Harley in nursery school has changed my life. For a few (surprisingly short) hours of the day, I have time to do the things I need to get done. Mostly, that’s work. But sometimes it can include a quick waxing appointment, some yoga, or writing some words here. She just goes for the mornings, and those mornings go by ridiculously quickly. But they still make a huge difference, and I’m so incredibly grateful for them. Nursery school is fantastic, but that doesn’t mean it’s easy.

When Harley started, she would cry. Like, a lot. Not just at drop off… she would scream and cry throughout the day. I was really wondering if it was just too traumatic for her, if I was making a horrible mistake. Every morning when I would drop her off and she would wail, I felt like the worst possible mother – not just because I would leave her while she was upset, but because I so desperately needed that time apart. I was filled with so much guilt, feeling like the worst mom on the planet. Now, things are way easier, so here are some things to keep in mind (and do) to make starting nursery school as easy as possible. Continue Reading

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Growing up in Zoe’s room

Harley with busy board

When I was a very little girl, my mom was good friends with a woman named Diane Ponzio – they were childhood friends. I remember her teaching me singing when I was a kid, and she even wrote a song about me. It’s called Zoe’s Room, and it’s been in my head lately. When I drive around with Harley, I often sing to her, and it’s funny which songs come to mind. After a booking for our family to go to Greensleaves (a medieval restaurant experience), I kept singing the song Greensleaves in the car. Now, it’s Zoe’s Room that’s stuck on repeat in my head, and it’s making me smile and also think about my goals for Harley.

There doesn’t seem to be a video or anything of Diane singing the whole song, but I did find this extract so you can get the gist of it: Continue Reading

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What are your non-negotiables?

non-negotiables

Most of life, and particularly parenting, feels like a negotiating process. We adjust the rules to fit our lives, allowing our kids to do some things that might have surprised an earlier version of ourselves. People who despise pacifiers grow to love them, and then hate them again. People who don’t believe in thumb sucking finally decide it’s not worth the fight and maybe just end up paying for braces down the line. I try to keep Harley from playing with pens or climbing on tables, but I’ve given up on trying to keep her from eating her food off the floor. Most everything is up for discussion or flexibility, but not quite everything. There are some things that simply aren’t up for debate, that aren’t negotiable, and I’m wondering what are your non-negotiables.

For me, it comes down to safety. I mean, life and death sorta safety. I think Mandy from Pregnant in Cape Town put it best when she wrote about carseats for the first time, saying is the alternative your child dying? If your kid wants to wear a weird outfit to school or eat breakfast for dinner, I doubt they will die from it. But failing to strap your munchkin into a carseat? It really is a matter of life and death, even in a low-speed collision. Scary, scary stuff. Continue Reading

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A gamer’s thoughts on screen time

I am a gamer, a geek, and a lover of all things tech and gadgetry. Before my little one came along, there was nothing more relaxing than a weekend spent chilling with Dean at home, each playing our video games of choice, perhaps binging on some series on Netflix. I’m often guilty of the second screen thing, too, where I’ll be watching TV or playing a game while simultaneously checking messages or social media on my phone or tablet. When it was just the two of us, I never really worried about it – sure, we’d lose ourselves in our virtual worlds, but Dean and I would also enjoy an evening sitting outside sharing a bottle of wine. We could dive deep into our screen time, but then also have fun cooking together, or going out to see friends, or travel off on a fun adventure.

Since Harley came along, I’m much more aware of screen time – not just hers, but also mine and Dean’s. She is 11 months old and figured out a while ago that grabbing for my phone would always get my attention. Granted, it’s a valuable device that I don’t want thrown on the floor, but I wonder if she also realizes how often I’m holding onto it and by grabbing it she is sure to be noticed. But it’s not about absolutes with me. I still love gaming, I still love series, and one day soon I hope for a VR headset of my own. It’s not that screen time is somehow inherently evil, but it certainly needs to be monitored. Continue Reading

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A pause at 11 months

11 months

Today, Harley is 11 months old. I honestly feel dumbfounded about it. I know time keeps marching on, I understand that the older we get, the faster time seems to move. And everyone warned me that having a baby makes time go even faster. I get all of that, and yet I simply can’t understand where the last 11 months have gone. How can Harley be so big already? How can so many months have passed?

It’s tempting to look at this milestone as almost a year. She is almost a year old, it’s been almost a year since she came into our lives… and yet, that somehow seems to undermine the impact of 11 months. It’s not quite a year, it’s something different. It’s something that still deserves a celebration, and moment to pause and look back on the time that’s elapsed and the time that’s ahead. I mean, after this milestone, I doubt I’ll be counting months anymore. From here on out, it will be years, and they will still go screaming past. So, here’s a break, a breather, to think about 11 months. Continue Reading

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