Tag Archives: Parenting

Activities for baby development – 9-12 months old

Harley is screaming ahead in her development. It seems that every day there is a new discovery, a new ability, a new goal. I want to do everything I can for my little one to develop, to help her reach her milestones and understand the world around her. I want to help her become a little genius, not just the savant kind that is only good at one thing – I want to help her become a balanced, brilliant, creative, free-thinking, kind human being. Of course it’s all conjecture about how to do that at this point, but here are some ideas for what helps little blobs develop into cool people.

This is a really important time for baby development. That first year of life is incredible if you think how much they accomplish. To go from crying, helpless blobs to tiny people who can play, get around and sort of communicate… it’s amazing! Because they are growing so much during this period, it’s important to work with them on motor skills, as well as social and mental development. At this point, physical stuff is still the most important as it’s how babies experience the world and understand everything from how their bodies work to how the world and physics work (yes, Harley knows that things drop now, even though she still enjoys testing it out). Continue Reading

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2 Comments Child Development, Parenting

I love watching my baby figure things out

I’ve written so much about learning, about early childhood development. I am always so intrigued by the way that we discover the world, and all the ways that we as parents can help our kids understand the world around them. The first few years of their lives are so important, can make such a difference. And sure, they all learn to do things even without extra fun activities, but it’s just so rewarding to watch them learn and explore. But seeing that understanding in their eyes? There’s nothing quite like it!

I will still write about swimming lessons, and bath time, but this is just a quick post about a specific moment that made me so happy. Last night, Harley was taking a bath. We had already done all the cleaning stuff, naming her body and getting her face wet as training for swimming. So it was basically “free play” in the water. She could just sit there and play with her toys, splash or whatever else she wanted to do. It’s how I generally do bath time, and the ending bit where she just plays can last anywhere from 2-10 minutes depending on how she seems and how bored either of us gets. Continue Reading

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3 Comments Parenting

Here’s my list of questions for picking out a nursery school

questions for picking out a nursery school

I mentioned yesterday that I plan to put Harley into nursery/playschool/creche from next year. I really think it’s the best thing for all of us; it will be nice for me to have time to get things done in the morning without her, she can have awesome stimulation and socializing time, and we can both have even more fun when we are together. Plus, I think I’ll be less stressed and chaotic and more able to be present with her, with Dean and with work stuff. So yeah, win-win situation. Of course, I need to find the right school, which means asking the right questions for picking out a nursery school when I go and visit.

There are a few things that I know are different for me than some people, so this list might not be ideal for you but can at least give you a jumping off point. See, at this age, I don’t want any focus on “academics”. This is the time in her life when she is just supposed to play, not be made to sit down and actively learn. She will already be learning so much by playing, exploring new environments and interacting with different people. I also don’t want her exposed to religious education – theological education is fine, so if they celebrate all the holidays or all religions, I don’t mind, but it mustn’t be a religious school in the sense of teaching just one. Anyway, here are some of my questions for picking out a nursery school: Continue Reading

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13 Comments Parenting

Equality is impossible so suck it up

A big thrust of my goals with Harley has been to raise her in a fairly gender neutral way. I want her to know that girls and women can do anything, be anything. If she wants to be a doctor, an astronaut, or president, she can do exactly that. And I totally stand by that goal. I also wanted to raise her to not feel imposed upon by society’s gender norms, but I realize that’s not really up to me.

I believe in fighting against inequality in all its manifestations. It’s only by fighting the gender wage gap, the pink tax, awful rape culture and systemic gender stereotypes that we can change the world. But even as we fight, we have to be realistic about what is expected of women and girls, and how we have to play the game to be successful. Continue Reading

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26 Comments Rambling

Is bullying ever okay?

Bullying is awful and a big deal. I don’t envy kids today – thanks to social media, school bullying doesn’t end with the last bell and can cause serious psychological scars. But it’s not just kids who get bullied. There’s that woman who accidentally shared a picture intended for her husband with a whole Whatsapp group, who is being shamed by almost all of South Africa through the continual sharing of her picture. Or the parents of the kid who fell in with Harambe, who were blamed and accused of being bad parents. Or anyone who is shamed in shopping centers for breastfeeding, or for having a toddler throw a tantrum, or for going back to work, or for not going back to work… the list goes on and on.

I often write about feeling judged, about my continual affirmation that no one can tell me how to raise my kid. I’ve talked about not apologizing when Harley cries, or about how I know what’s best for my little one and how irritated I get when other people tell me that she must be cold or need to eat differently. I am adamant that every baby is different and that I don’t care what people do – if they want to use disposable or cloth nappies, if they opt for breast or bottle, if they stay home or work, if kids are put in creche/day care or stay home with a nanny or au pair. Everyone needs to make life work for them, and who am I to judge anyone for any of those decisions? So I’ve been a bit taken aback by a new instinct I’ve had. Continue Reading

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1 Comment Rambling