Tag Archives: Sleep

1001 Nights of Bedtime – The ups and downs of sleep in the early years

1001 Nights of Bedtime

(Photo credit: Becca Gutierrez with Rusty Metals Photography  // @RustyMetalsPhotography)

Whether on TV or all the articles online, parents idolize bedtime. It’s that special time with kids, an important part of the routine and a key part of bonding. Or so they say. Let’s be realistic, though – unless you do sleep training or have a magic kid, it’s probably also a bit of a struggle. The first years are the hardest for obvious reasons, and I just keep thinking of them as the 1001 nights of bedtime, and just like Scheherazade’s story, it can be about survival more than love.

I know, I know, these will be the times I’ll look back on fondly when Harley is older. This is part of how I’m building a solid foundation of love and trust with her. But mostly, I end up trapped under a hot toddler who screams at me if I move. So yeah, the Scheherazade thing fits. Maybe. Continue Reading

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1 Comment Parenting, Rambling

Sleep training, co-sleeping and believing in myself

co-sleeping lie

Sleep. I love it, and I miss my old sleep patterns so much. I’m one of those people who has always loved sleep. I could stay up and party with the best of them, but most of the time I’d be in bed by 10 at night, asleep by 10:30 and happily lie in until eight or nine in the morning (when I didn’t have to go to work, obviously). Then, we had a baby, and all that changed. She hasn’t been a horrible sleeper, but she never did that whole sleep through for 12 hours thing. Ever. The best I’ve ever had is six hours of straight sleep, followed by a few more two to three hour intervals.

Recently, I started reading about night weaning as a means of helping her sleep through the night. But the more I read, the more everyone seemed to say that we had to get her bedtime routine down, that she had to learn how to soothe herself to sleep or she’d always need me to help her fall back to sleep in the middle of the night. While the articles made sense, I simply don’t believe in sleep training. I know it works for people, but I’m adamant that I will never let Harley just cry, that while it might teach her to “self soothe”, it also breaks her trust that I will always make her feel better, that I will always listen when she needs me. Continue Reading

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I am not made for co-sleeping

If you talk to anyone who has made a person, they will tell you something about co-sleeping. It’s honestly a lovely idea – babies aren’t used to being alone seeing as they were with us all through pregnancy, so they actually prefer to be with us all the time, including during sleep. Many parents around the world share their beds with their little ones. The concept of the family bed is pretty much as old as humanity, and it’s meant to be way more convenient for midnight feeds, and help everyone get a better night’s sleep. But not me.

I knew I wasn’t cut out for co-sleeping even before Harley arrived. I’ve never been able to sleep well next to other people. I can count on one hand the number of people I can share my bed with and still actually sleep. In fact, it’s a way that I gauge comfort with someone – if I can sleep properly next to you, we must be pretty damn compatible. When I slept soundly next to Dean, it was part of how I knew we were pretty awesome together, plus I wanted to keep our bed as a place where it’s just the two of us and not a baby-oriented area. And while I adore Harley with a type of love I’ve never really known before, she simply isn’t my best sleeping companion. But that could also be because I keep worrying about killing her, something I rarely fear with anyone else I’ve ever slept with. Continue Reading

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16 Comments Marriage, Parenting

The dreaded “sleep regression”

Sleep regression

If, like me, you read your share of parenting books/site, you’ll know the term experts like to use is “sleep regression”. Supposedly, they happen at fairly predictable times. There’s the 4-6 month sleep regression, the 8-10 month sleep regression and the 18 month sleep regression. Personally, I hate the term. It’s as if the people who call it that have no experience with an actual baby, or parenthood, or sleep deprivation.

Harley hasn’t been a bad sleeper. I’ve heard such horror stories, I really can’t complain. From a relatively early age, she would sleep for 2-3 hours at a time, slowly extended to 3, 4, 5, 6 and eventually 8 hours of sleep. It was glorious. And then it was snatched away from me. For the past week or two, Harley has been refusing to nap, or fighting her naps so much that they’re almost impossible. You’d think that would leave her exhausted at night, but nope! Instead, she is up more frequently than she’s been in months. Obviously, this is taking its toll. Continue Reading

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4 Comments Rambling

Redefining a good night’s sleep

Last night, I got a pretty good night’s sleep. Now, before you get jealous, let’s qualify that statement. Harley went to bed at around 10 after being a fussy nightmare from 5 in the evening. She slept until 2am, when I woke up and nursed her, getting her back to sleep by 2:30ish. She woke up again at 5am and went back to sleep at about 5:30, giving me ten minutes to lie back in bed before my alarm went off.

As little miss 8 hours sleep, I never would have believe 6.5 hours of interrupted sleep would ever feel like a glorious night of rest, but it seems that my body has adapted in the month since getting Harley home. In fact, I don’t even feel like I need a nap today (although I may reconsider this evening), and I feel full of energy. Maybe it’s all relative, though, and I feel so well rested as compared to what some nights have been like, but I think there are a few factors in that. Continue Reading

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6 Comments Breast feeding, Parenting, Rambling