Browsing Category: Featured

How this mommy and baby class saved me and Harley

July 13, 2016 Zoe

With Harley now seven months old, I have enough distance from those early weeks and months to look back with some perspective. I’ve written about how traumatic her birth experience was, but even then I didn’t realize how traumatic it was and how hard it was going to make things with her. I was sick, she was so very premature, and we had quite a road ahead of us. I struggled to bond with her, I felt like everything was just so hard, and I was even resenting her. It was NOT good.

Luckily, while still pregnant, I had already decided that I wanted to try and find a nice mommy and baby class to attend once she was born. There are so many out there, so I wasn’t quite sure which one I’d go for. But I chatted to Geoff, my editor at Lazygamer, and his wife used to own a TOPTOTS franchise, so I decided to give them a whirl. It turns out, that was one of the best decisions I’ve made in the first six months of Harley’s life. Continue Reading

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4 Comments Child Development, Parenting, South Africa, Sponsored

Attachment parenting and the most important year

July 12, 2016 Zoe

I can’t stress enough how lucky I am. Sure, I have plenty of ups and downs and real life and troubles like everyone else, but I am incredibly lucky – I work from home. While it’s a lot of hard work, and I’ve struggled to find a balance at times, it has meant that I’ve been able to work and take care of Harley at the same time. She hasn’t needed a nanny or a creche; I have been her primary caretaker, her teacher, her entertainment, her jungle gym, her bed, her food source, so in a word – her mommy.

It hasn’t been easy, and I often felt like I was failing. Especially when Harley was even smaller than she is now, I wondered if it was enough to just hold her during the day while I worked, I would get frustrated when I didn’t know what was wrong or when I felt like I couldn’t help her. It’s gotten so much easier as she has gotten bigger and easier to understand, and a big part of that is because we both know that I can take care of her, even when I’m not totally sure how. But the more I read about attachment parenting, the more it sounds like what I’ve done with Harley naturally, and will continue to do cognizantly. Continue Reading

9 Comments Parenting

Attachment parenting Baby baby girl

Unexpected sources of inspiration

July 11, 2016 Zoe

Inspiration is a strange thing. Some people and things inspire us to be better humans, better parents, better workers… and while I typically know some things that can inspire me, I love being surprised at those things that bring out that magical spark in me. That is sort of the purpose of art, isn’t it? To reflect a part of ourselves or our society back at us, make us reassess who or what we are, and inspire us to become better versions of those things. Well, this most recent inspiration that I experienced came in a totally unlikely place.

You see, since starting this blog, I’ve started to be invited to events that aren’t just for gaming or tech. Not to downplay gaming or tech events – they are fun and often incredibly beautiful. But they feel extremely PR-oriented. They are built to make the journalists and blogggers in attendance take pictures of the pretty things and share on social media, to promote the brand. And while the people who work for those brands are often awesome and wonderful, the goal of their events is rarely to help connect people or make us feel special or important. But this mommy blogger event… it was very different. Continue Reading

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Baby Blogger Event Inspiration

Support networks and other necessary things

July 7, 2016 Zoe

Being a mom is hard. Actually, let me correct that, being a human is hard. Even before becoming a mom, I had plenty of ups and down in life. Life is hard no matter where you are, who you are and what your background is. Sure, there are some ways that things can be made easier, but no one lives a charmed life. However, being a mom feels even more trying because you often feel alone.

I don’t know what it is that’s so lonely about motherhood – maybe it the sleep deprivation, or the weird things your baby or partner does that you think can’t be normal and you must the only one experiencing. Maybe it’s all the weird comments or visuals we see on TV or online – those picture perfect moments where moms and babies just coo at each other and everyone looks happy and well rested, with perfect hair and clean clothes. Instead, so many women struggle with feelings of inadequacy, inferiority and painful loneliness. This is why we all need support networks. Continue Reading

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Friends Friendship Motherhood

Socks and food and other baby dramas

July 6, 2016 Zoe

I never really interacted much with moms or babies before joining this special tribe of motherhood. I didn’t particularly like babies. I mean sure, they’re cute and stuff, but I wouldn’t go out of my way to look at one or ooh and aah. But, if I saw a pregnant woman or family with small children walking towards a closed door or carrying things, I’d always open doors or offer to help; if waiting behind a mother and child in the checkout at a store I’d smile, make faces at the kid and maybe tell the mom or dad how adorable or charming their child was.

You know, normal, good human being stuff. But I’d never try to hold someone’s person, I tried to avoid asking weirdly personal questions, and generally just limited my engagement to compliments and smiles or understanding before moving on. I wish more people were like me from back then. Continue Reading

39 Comments Parenting, Rambling

baby girl bad mother Breast Feeding