Are all trustee boards inherently awful?

trustee board

I live in a complex. It’s not ideal, but it’s a pretty nice place to stay. It was great as a first home for me and Dean, and while it’s getting pretty small now, at least it’s safe, and nicely run. We bought our unit seven years ago now, and four years ago I became a trustee so that I could keep tabs on the estate and make sure our investment was being well taken care of. A couple years later, some real rabble rousers started to get involved, and our then chairman who had managed the complex for almost a decade decided it was better to sell his unit and get out than to stay on. He advised me to do the same. I planned on resigning from the trustee board, but instead got roped into becoming the chairperson (yeah, don’t ask me how that happened).

After a year as chair, a whole new trustee board was elected and it seemed okay. We had a new chairperson (thankfully, seeing as I hated being the chair), and things continued on. Our estate even managed to install fiber, which is really all I ever wanted anyway. But now it seems like chaos reigns supreme, with all sorts of secret meetings, backstabbing, scheming and nepotism. Is this just what all trustee boards and home owners associations become? Continue Reading

How much does it cost to feed your family?

cost to feed your family

I came across an interesting blog yesterday. In it Hayley asks if everyone else is spending a fortune feeding their families, and she described her monthly shopping. It sounded almost exactly like my shopping, and I’ve been wondering the same thing – Dean and I live a comfortable life, but I keep finding that our money is getting tighter and tighter and the majority of our spending seems to go towards food. I’ve been paying closer attention because of an article I’m going to write as part of Harassed Mom‘s series called “What we ate this week” (I promise I will answer your questions soon, Laura!). We really spend a lot just to eat these days.

Part of it is, yes, takeaways or going out to eat. But surprisingly, that’s not as big a thing as I imagined. We might go without cooking once or twice in the week, but for the most part we cook our food. Plus, I like to think that I’m pretty smart with how we shop. I tend to buy our meat once, or maybe twice in the month online from a fantastic butcher who delivers. Their prices are really reasonable and the quality of the meat is great. Plus, I order all the things in 500 gram or 1kg portions, so it’s already nicely divided – just throw it in my deep freezer and pull out what I need, as and when I need it; just the right amount for dinner at night and my breakfast and lunch of leftovers. The rest of our food usually comes from the two local stores – PicknPay and Woolies. Continue Reading

New friends, old friends, fake friends

friends

It’s a strange aspect of having lived an international life. My oldest friends aren’t based in Joburg, which means that I don’t get to see them all that much. It’s mostly okay, though, because we stay in touch with all the usual digital means of our modern age, plus Dean and I have made some new friends. We’ve lived here long enough to have gone through the usual cycle of friendship in a new city – it always takes about three years to become settled in a new place, to build your network and made real friendships. Having lived in South Africa for eight years now, I’ve not only managed that, but there are even some awesome people in my life locally who are our old and wonderful friends.

This past weekend, though, we were visited by an old friend and it was hard for me to not feel nostalgic. Back in university, Dean and I belonged to a fraternity. I always hated the idea of sororities or fraternities, until I realized just how wonderful it was. Loki was the name of our grouping, and it was filled with a quirky and international mix of men and women. We would go out once a week for official drinks, but more often than not a bunch of us would go out several more times in the week. Considering that Dean and I were going out six nights a week at that stage, it’s no wonder we had a big group of friends. What is surprising is how those same people still fit who we are. Continue Reading

SNAPnSAVE will save you money no matter where you shop

snapnsave

Babies are expensive. Actually, no, the baby themselves aren’t expensive – there are easy ways to keep your baby clean, fed and safe without spending a fortune. The expenses come for all the things you want to do with your child, you know, like educate them or take them to swimming classes (something I’ve started and will be blogging about soon!). Times are tight, and whether you have kids or not, we can all benefit from saving money. Recently, I wrote about SNAPnSAVE on Tums2Tots, and I just have to share why it’s so cool.

You can read about how the app actually works in my article, but the main thing I’m impressed by is that you can shop pretty much anywhere. Do you typically buy a pie at the petrol station? Or your milk at Spar vs PicknPay? No problem, SNAPnSAVE is still rad for you. It’s more about the products you buy rather than where you buy them. Continue Reading

Equality in parenting, a Women’s Day ramble reprised

Women's Day

Today is Women’s Day in South Africa. Last year, I wrote about it while pregnant, wondering how much equality there was in parenting. It was sort of a wondering blog, about feminism and parenting. I wondered just how much of the burden would be on me, just how much of the childcare would fall to me, and just how equal I could expect things to be even with the most loving and awesome husband. A year later, I have some answers, although I expect the answers will continue to change in the coming years.

So far, I do the lion’s share of the parenting. When Harley cries in the middle of the night, I’m always the one to take care of her. A big part of that is that I’ve got the boobs. I’m the only one in the marriage who is uniquely equipped to feed and soothe her. We tried the pumping thing, but once Harley started latching on the boob, she really and truly hated the bottle, so it simply isn’t a solution for us. But that doesn’t mean there isn’t some form of equality in how Dean and I handle things. Continue Reading