Why I blog

It’s hot. Joburg is currently experiencing a heat wave that makes me want to die. Yesterday, I went swimming twice, and I think that I will do the same today. I was going to blog about living as a puddle for this week, but thanks to some conversations recently with a bunch of people, I realized that some of you might not really understand the point of this blog. I don’t think I’ve even totally clarified it for myself, so I might as well do the meta thing and blog about blogging.

I have been a long time diary keeper. Journaling has helped me figure things out, from how I feel about various people and situation, to actions that I think will be best. Writing on a regular basis helped strengthen the muscle, making it easier to write articles and other pieces on a regular basis. I still occasionally write in a journal, mostly because I love the feeling of putting (fountain) pen to paper, but this blog has taken over as my primary place of working things through. Continue Reading

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On getting kicked out of the boy’s club

I have always been “one of the guys”. As a kid, I used to have mostly male friends and I always felt at home with the banter and jokes of being around the boys. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve developed more and better female friendships with women who are truly brilliant, hilarious and awesome in every way. But I still always feel at home with my male friends and colleagues. At least, most of the time.

Over on Lazygamer.net, where I work, I often write about how I haven’t experienced the kind of sexism or abuse that is so often talked about in gaming and tech. It’s not to say that it never happens, of course it does, but not on the scale or frequency as often depicted. When it has happened, I’ve made a point of calling it out, highlighting what happened and why it wasn’t cool, so that hopefully people can improve or at least be more aware in the future. But this most recent experience probably had more to do with my being pregnant rather than female, although it was no less distressing. Continue Reading

5 Comments Gaming, Pregnancy

Even an easy pregnancy isn’t easy

The joys of getting pregnant, or even being open about wanting to fall pregnant, mean everyone and their mother will tell you their pregnancy stories. Most of them include vomiting, weight gain, stretch marks, heartburn and a myriad other issues and complaints. Sure, we were made to be able to procreate, it’s what our bodies are designed to do. But that doesn’t mean it’s going to be easy.

I’ve been quite lucky, I think. Compared to most other women I’ve talked to, I haven’t had horrific nausea. In fact, I’ve had no morning sickness and only mild nausea if surrounded by food that I know my body won’t tolerate. Until now, I’ve had pretty decent sleep, my skin and hair has been okay and I’ve felt pretty decent. Yes, I’ve struggled with heartburn, and my first trimester was basically a 3-month-long cold, but compared to what I’ve heard, I haven’t had a pregnancy from hell. Continue Reading

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“Just because you’re strong enough doesn’t mean you have to”

I can’t stress enough how kind people are are to me here in Africa as a pregnant woman. It’s like everyone is going out of their way to be nice, to be thoughtful, and to make my life a little bit easier. Sure, there are still things that need doing, and there are still moments when people act like idiots, but I am just so happy to be carrying around the munchkin in this of all places.

At the store recently, I had bought a bunch of groceries, but not that many. They all fit in one bag and I was just going to carry it to the car. But I was tired and hesitated for a moment before lifting my bag from the bagging area in the shop. The woman who had helped me grabbed a trolley for me to put the bag in, and I said that I thought I could carry it. Her response was lovely, and something that I sort of want to live by for the duration of this pregnancy. Continue Reading

3 Comments Pregnancy, South Africa

A kick in the soul

I haven’t been feeling much in the way of bonding with Harley the last week or so. Nothing was wrong, she was moving a lot and I had moments of feeling my heart swell for her, but I wasn’t feeling that same “holy crap I can’t wait to meet this human I’m growing” feeling.

I think part of it was the swollen feet and general tiredness that I’ve been going through. I just haven’t had the energy to get excited, even though I know that I should be. But today I went for my 28 week scan, and of course that all changed again.

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